Donald Trump Seeks War on Sun

​NEWS ITEM – President-elect Donald Trump, stating that he doesn’t really believe that solar energy is economically viable, nor that its growth is in the long term “best interests” of the United States, announced today that one of his first priorities as President will be to declare war against the Sun.

Further, the incoming president indictates that he doesn’t think the sun should be allowed to continue to be a nuclear power.

“Look, for years the sun has been launching radiation, solar flares, whatever… at Earth, flowing out of almost everywhere and the UN has done nothing.  Absolutely nothing.  They’re a useless, bloated bureaucracy sitting in one of the ugliest buildings in Manhattan.  This is some of the most prime real estate in New York City, folks and it’s just sitting there useless, not paying any taxes. And President Obama?  He has known that this has been happening since Day One and what has he done? Nothing. That’s just wrong.  And it’s going to change.”

Dennis Miller, spokesman for the pro-sun group “Miller Light” issued a press release against Mr Trump’s proposal calling it “an appeal to the darker side of humanity”, but Trump ally Newt Gingrich dismissed the group as a just shadowy “less filling” organization funded by groups like Bain Capital, which, “we all know is run by well known anti-Trump conspirator and nary a hair out of place critic Mitt Romney.”

“If you ask me, there’s entirely too much public fascination with and dependence on the sun.  It’s unhealthy, it causes cancer and heatstroke and drought for millions of people each year. Fascinating studies have shown that there is essentially nothing useful that we currently get from the sun, that we can’t get from tanning beds instead.  Tanning beds, incidentally, made in America by American workers.”

Mr Trump told reporters, “We all know that these are kooky, left wing nutjobs. But once we destroy the sun, everyone will see the lies and the deceptions these people have been telling us about global warming. Its just a hoax, folks. And once the sun is gone, environmentalist groups like these will be begging the government for coal-fired power plants.”

Meanwhile, former president Jimmy Carter told a Chicago newspaper that he will be making a personal trip to the sun, as a private citizen, to try to find a way to lower the diplomatic temperature.

Acknowledging that, while the sun is one of the most hostile places in the solar system for humans to exist, Mr Carter refused to specifically condemn living conditions there. “When dealing with ‘nucular energy’ and its possible cataclysmic effects on us all, every step should be taken to ensure that… cooler heads prevail.”

In the meantime, during a surprisingly candid interview on the Kelly File on FOX News, where host Megyn Kelly seems to be finally realizing that the American public really doesn’t care where she ends up, Clinton campaign advisor John Podesta refused to rule out the possiblility of Russian influence on Trump’s decision. 
 
PODESTA: “Look, it is clear that the sun is a large, angry, white mass of light with a discernable, recognized history of explosive outbursts that has been largely taken for granted…”
KELLY: “Which we all certainly read about in your emails…”
PODESTA: “As such Trump and the sun would actually seem to me to have some natural common interests, but no.  So it is reasonable to ask, who is really behind this agenda?” 
KELLY: “Well I certainly dont know, do you?”
PODESTA: “Megyn, while I was in London last week to deliver a lecture tothe British public about their clearly unenlightened decision to leave the EU, it occurred to me to wonder, “Who benefits from an attack on the sun?”
KELLY: “Mr. Podesta…  Obviously I’m not Bill O’Reilly, but I am taller than Sean Hannity and a former lawyer.  In your opinion, where does the evidence lead?”
PODESTA:  “Megyn, as I told Rachel Maddow and both her viewers last night, it turns out we’re not exactly sure who to blame, but clearly it’s not the Clinton campaign’s fault.”

Finally, later in the evening, the cast of Cirque de Soleil interrupted a performance of the show in Sun City, FL to appeal to Vice President-elect Mike Pence, who happened to be in attendance, along with a number of political luminaries. Afterwards, Mr Pence, seeming somewhat subdued, simply stated, “This will not be an easy struggle. I would just ask the prayers of all Americans in the coming dark days ahead.”

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I am a faulty, sometimes shallow, hesitant Christian. And I think that is a good thing.

Justanyjon

There was a time in my life when my faith could easily fit into a box. It was a convenient Christianity.

I came to God in my twenties. Before that time, I hadn’t been to church in years. Nobody “led me to Christ”, I never went to bible camp growing up and I really don’t ever recall anyone trying to “”witness” to me prior to that.

I was an agnostic, but a curious one. One day, I just went into a bookstore and bought a Living Bible (a paraphrased modern English translation) and started reading literally from “(In) the beginning”. Every day. For four months.

In doing so, what spoke to my heart, especially in the New Testament, was coming to the realization of the depth of God’s unconditional love for us. A genuine love that I had been searching and longed for. It was real and it was personal…

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Brain4Rent's Blog

A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows. ~Doug Larson

Multi-generational DandelionLock me up now – I love dandelions. All of them, in all stages, though for some reason, I believe the domed d-lions have far more appeal than their flat-faced brethren, but only in their yellow stage. Their puff stage is all about wishes and whims of wind. Vase-resistant, they cannot be cut up for anything but the limpest bouquets. They are opportunistic field flowers, able to grow in the cracks of a super highway or in the crease between tenement house and concrete slab. They sparkle like champagne bubbles across a grassy field. By what contorted thinking is that not a gift of nature?

Consider the effort that goes into the destruction of weeds in the lawn, especially dandelions. Many are so vigilant in their desire to exterminate the easy…

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I am a faulty, sometimes shallow, hesitant Christian. And I think that is a good thing.

There was a time in my life when my faith could easily fit into a box. It was a convenient Christianity.

I came to God in my twenties. Before that time, I hadn’t been to church in years. Nobody “led me to Christ”, I never went to bible camp growing up and I really don’t ever recall anyone trying to “”witness” to me prior to that.

I was an agnostic, but a curious one. One day, I just went into a bookstore and bought a Living Bible (a paraphrased modern English translation) and started reading literally from “(In) the beginning”. Every day. For four months.

In doing so, what spoke to my heart, especially in the New Testament, was coming to the realization of the depth of God’s unconditional love for us. A genuine love that I had been searching and longed for. It was real and it was personal. And, for me, that love is what established the core of my faith.

Over time, with the best of intentions, some of that “core” got covered over. I developed into essentially what a Christian was “supposed” to be. Go to church every Sunday, say your prayers, believe the right things, don’t express doubts, etc. But it was an empty shell. It looked good, but it was hollow. In truth, my spiritual life revolved around seeking the “things” of God, looking at the people of God and not pursuing and holding onto the essential God. And somehow, over time, I lost track of why I came to God in the first place. When the storms of life eventually hit, it all fell apart.

Not too many years ago I went though probably the most emotionally and spiritually devastating episode of my life. I am not without fault in that episode. But I am also not guilty of things that were believed about me. The specifics are not important. But what I took out of that episode and what the essential struggle for so many years was “Where was God?”

So many of us go through life just living only “what” we choose to believe. We check off categories on a list in our minds; about politics, morality, humanity, etc., whatever aspect of life that is relevant to where and who we are. We become set in our ways, never questioning, never wondering. In terms of faith, for some, it’s the easiest thing; the path of least resistance. They will go along believing “what” they believe, but never allow themselves to be willingly brought to their knees, having to desperately ask “why?” It is not a question as to whether one’s faith is real or not, it is a question of how deep it is.

Frankly, I really don’t believe anyone can have a deep faith in God without ever having a crisis of faith (or two, or three…). But being there doesn’t always leave you stronger. At least not immediately.

One thing I had to confront was my own perception of what God really was. Is he some magic genie that I summon to save me every time dire consequences approach? Does He have to do what I want Him to do? (Is that all we really want?)

For a long time I was angry with God. Why didn’t He protect me from this injustice? How could I believe He loved me if He let me go through this… crap? (except that I used another word) But in the end, I did not walk away. Why did I believe? I guess it boiled down to the fact that I knew what my life was before God and, despite my anger, I was at the point of having nothing to grasp onto except what was essentially just the hope of God’s love, knowing that if I let go of that, all that I saw was a black abyss.

But God was there. God demonstrated that He IS love and that He shows His compassion on us. The perfect God specifically chose to put His Holy Spirit in, of all things, us faulty, silly, selfish imperfect human beings. At a time when I could see nothing but pain and sadness, He showed that people DID care and comfort, sometimes to my amazement. At times when I felt like “why would anyone love me?” people not only chose to do just that, but saw great hopes and possibilities in me.

My faith is not perfect. I have struggles and doubts. I question my presumptions and have many things that, yes indeed, I want to ask God about. But I don’t need an answer today.

I still have hurts that take away some of my confidence, but then again, hopefully as well, some of my arrogance in what and how I believe. I still find myself wanting to do things to get God’s approval when it’s impossible for me to do anything to get what I already have.

Admittedly, I do not go to church regularly right now. I suppose it is a reluctance to open up to the chance of being hurt again. Right or wrong, this is just where the human part of me is at the moment.

But I know what God calls me to and it is what I seek to strive towards. I realize the more I know about God, the less I realize about God.

I do not want to be an ordinary Christian. I want to be a Christian that genuinely reflects the Christ who is within me.

In the meantime, He has allowed me to be content with where I am right now.

(Selah)

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